The Most Courageous Man I Knew

Hi,

I’m Adrian, one of Uncle Lawrence’s nephews. My wife and I went to visit Uncle Lawrence in the hospital on the Thursday night before he passed away. When we went, we had brought a letter telling him about what we remembered most about him. I am going to read that letter now.

 October 29, 2009

Dear Uncle Lawrence,

I’m not terrific at articulating my words, so I thought writing them down would be a little easier. There is something I need you to know.

You are one of the most courageous men that I know. Throughout your sickness, you have never given up. You have diligently confronted each obstacle that has been pushed your way, and I get the sense, for as long as you have breath, you’ll continue to fight. This is a gift you have passed on to my wife and I, and we thank you so sincerely for it.

I want you to know that you have made my life better in ways that you might not even realize. Whenever I think back on my younger years I remember things like you chasing us through the doons in South Hampton, or you tickling my brothers and I until the laughing actually hurt.  And I remember running through a poison ivy filled field with you. Actually, I didn’t run. You carried me (and each of my brothers) individually. I’m pretty sure you got poison ivy from that, and we didn’t. As I reflect on these times, I realize that the way you treated us is the way I can only hope I will treat my own children one day. And I thank you for it, as well.

And as I sit here writing, and you continue to fight, I realize that the way you have lived your life is the way I hope I can live mine: courageous, loyal to your family, and with a passion for life.

That, I think, is what impresses me so much: that no matter what you have gone through, you have continued to live your life. Life has been so unfair to you, and still you have pressed on. I can’t even articulate how much I am impacted by this.

I want you to know that whenever I think of courage, I think of you. You are so brave. I have always loved the quotation from To Kill a Mockingbird that says, “Courage is knowing you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do.” However, it is only in the past couple years—as you have battled your sickness—have these words truly meant something to me. Perhaps I sound a little cliché, but I truly mean it. You embody courage to me. I’ll never forget that.

Know that we are thinking and praying for you a lot these days. We know you will keep fighting because we know that it would be impossible for you to do anything less.

 We love you very much, Uncle Lawrence.

Adrian and Amy

 —

Of course, Uncle Lawrence passed on a week later.  But Uncle Lawrence left a legacy for all of us. That’s a big word: legacy. It’s what people remember most about you.  I hope I leave one, but not everyone does. . And Uncle Lawrence’s legacy to my wife and I is that no matter what hits you with, you keep going. That’s courage. And because of that, we’ll never, ever forget Uncle Lawrence.

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